sighs. when all you have is seconds left with that person you love, you don't know whether to cry or to laugh or to enjoy that last few moments. you know when people always ask you how are you gonna spend your last hour or last day on earth? you think you can embrace it with ease and laugh your day away usually. but when you're really in that last hour, you'll be more of like missing your family, your loved ones, you friends and stuff. because 60 minutes really isn't that long. when a day passes in a blink of an eye, what is an hour?


sighs. i really can't bear to see her go. yet, i have to embrace this fact. because i don't have a choice, at all. i don't understand why this has to happen when i don't want it to. i thought she would think for me but since she has her own explanations, i can't say anything then. everyone asks me whether does she feel that same heart wrenching emotion that i go through, i don't know how to answer. the very politically correct textbook answer is to say yes she does to protect her. but quite frankly speaking, i can tell you that i really don't know. i don't know whether she really goes through that same heart wrenching emotion. i just wished that she insisted on staying here.


i really just wished for that.

SO! tonight im meeting my ladies!! =D finally after ages~ omggg. can't wait to have them around and we can gossip like crazy. HAHA. and guess what's happening at my work place? casino night. and what's bad? i have to wear rabbit ears.. -.- lameo!!!

i went crubbing last night with mellie, jovin and kenneth(mel's friend). it was absolute fun! =) jovin was nice and brought me to sushi tei for my birthday celebration! or pre birthday celebration rather =D then we headed down to fashion bar. introduced missy au to him at azzucar then headed down to fashion bar for drinks. i had an apple martini and a choco martini. the choc martini wasn't as nice as i expected. then we headed to zirca after that. the music was good, not too bad. had a bit of fun before leaving early. pictures from melissa!


thank you jovin! sorry i was late!

thank you melissa! you're awesome company!

thank you kenneth! just for being there!


yay! its a good start!

sighs. i don't think i wanna celebrate my birthday. still broke like hell. shit. and i think i might just gather my close friends and club or just chill out. sighs. why am i so broke?

i think the idea of starting work at 11pm is awesome but then........ ending work at 6am means...........................................................................


haha. anyways! i have started work and im elated! haha. although its not the best place but actually, i think it will be quite fun. i hope! =D hee.

my birthday, my birthday.. i really don't wish to celebrate my birthday cause its pretty useless. i mean im gonna be f-ing 20 this year....... sighs.. so old and yet im still so childish and irresponsible about everything.. sighs. im still childish and young. whadda do? i need to grow up and start being more responsible in everything. responsibilityyyyyyy.. BUT!! next year i can start taking money from government.. WAHAHAHA! that's like the only thing im looking forward to next year. sighs......



i need money.. im whining like a bitch la.. but thennnnnnnn im looking for a job okayyyyyy. sighsssss


is that really my only way to relive some stress?

this post is to explain the previous post that there is a huge misunderstanding on the previous post.

well, i did quarrelled with you and the pointers did come up in the quarrel. as i was really angry, i decided to voice out everything. thinking that this is somehow my blog that i was hoping that people would understand my frustration when they meet with these sort of quarrels. but then, after clearing things up with you today, i believe that there's no more need for that previous post and this is the post that will clear up all you clouded and narrow minded people.


uhhhhh. i hope it does clear things up and for like further safety sake, im gonna like privatise this blog cause sometimes, my anger and frustration will cause like truckloads of misunderstandings.


and to you who feel upsets, im sorry.

Labels: sorry